Navigating Loss with a Grateful Heart
There is a unique kind of silence that settles into a home when a pet passes away. Recently, my 15-year-old Puggle, Bella, left this world, and the quiet she left behind has been profound.
Pets play such a vital role in our lives, don't they? Dogs, specifically, are our greatest professors of unconditional love—a pure, unwavering devotion that we all yearn for, but which can feel so elusive in our complex human relationships. As I navigate these tender days, I find myself reflecting on the gifts Bella left me—gifts that are helping me expand my capacity to love, to be grateful, and to truly appreciate the moments we share.
Lessons from a Life Well-Lived
Patience has never been one of my natural virtues, but Bella was a patient teacher. In her final months, she taught me the beauty of slowing down. Because I knew our time was coming to a close, I consciously chose to immerse myself in the present, knowing the next moment is never promised.
I will always cherish those quiet times spent massaging her frail bones and scratching her in all her favorite places. We would simply look into one another’s eyes, silently exchanging the love we felt. Those moments weren't about "doing"; they were about "being."
The Magic of Surrender and Vulnerability
I often find myself in leadership positions; it’s simply where I naturally land. But great loss requires a different kind of strength: the strength to surrender.
I’ve had to learn how to ask for help and, more importantly, how to allow others to help me. When we are broken and we simply can’t "carry the water" ourselves, magical things happen. By leaning on others, my relationships are growing in ways I never could have imagined. It’s a powerful reminder that vulnerability isn't a weakness—it’s the doorway to deeper connection.
Honoring the Soul
We are all wired differently, and there is no "right" way to grieve. For me, honoring Bella has been a journey of active remembrance:
Journaling: I wrote a love letter to my girl, putting into words the 15 years of joy she provided.
Reminiscing: I’ve spent time going through countless photos, reliving the adventures we shared and the great life we built together.
Storytelling: Sharing "Bella stories" with friends and family has been a healing for my heart.
Intentional Memorials: I am making plans to bury her ashes in a special place, creating a memorial that truly makes my heart sing.
As for her belongings, I am giving myself the gift of time. There is no rush to decide what to do with them. I am waiting until I find a way to honor her gift that feels truly meaningful.
Divine Reinforcement: Finding Comfort in Synchronicity
During this time, I have found that my senses are keener than usual. I am noticing things in a way I normally don't—a heightened awareness that often comes when we are navigating the depths of grief. Through this lens, two things have happened that I believe are far beyond mere coincidence; they are messages from the divine reinforcing that, while difficult, this was the right path.
A Timely Message of Affirmation: Shortly after Bella’s passing, I received a mug and a dog book from a friend who had no idea she was gone. The note about what a "great dog mom" I am arrived with divine timing, providing unsolicited reinforcement on a day I needed it most.
The Gift of the Rosebush: I had been thinking privately about replanting a rosebush at Bella’s memorial spot where one had died. That same day, a friend who knew nothing of my plan sent me a small indoor rosebush. To me, this was a clear message that she is in the best of hands and that my love for her is seen.
The Wisdom of the Pause
As an "A-typical" person, pausing doesn't come naturally to me. However, this process has reinforced the absolute truth behind the Power of the Pause. It is only by slowing down that I was able to catch these spiritual "winks" and magical moments as they came to fruition.
By tapping into my heart and practicing tools to bring my nervous system into coherence, I’ve found stability amidst the waves of grief. I am applying that hard-won patience to my life at large—hitting the pause button on big decisions and giving things space to develop. I have never once regretted it.
